Jealousy
by BloomingViolets
Summary: A one-shot short story from Paloma's POV. The youngest Lopez-Fitzgerald child reflects on her past and her feelings and tries to come to terms with it.


_Grrr!! Passions lately has been making me very very annoyed. Fox and Whitney?! Fox and Whitney?!?!?! That is just so wrong! Anyway, who thinks Palmoa is pretty? I do! (laughs) that one scene where she was jealously looking at Theresa and Pilar inspired this very short story! I think Paloma is a very interesting character, although maybe Passions tends to over exaggerate a little. I love her wild side! Anyways, this story was written in about ten minutes so forgive me if it seems a little rushed._

_**Disclaimer: **I think everyone should know this by now. I don't in anyway own Passions!_****

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**Jealousy**

Jealousy. It's funny how one word, one feeling can turn you from a sweet loveable person to an angry and bitter one. I am no stranger to jealousy, although I know I can make people jealous of me.

My name is Paloma Lopez-Fitzgerald. I grew up in sunny Mexico, although I had fond memories growing up there, but it was never my home. In Mexico, it seemed like I had everything. I was popular, and was the most sought after girl in school. All the guys wanted to go out with me and all the girls wanted to be my friends. I had good grades and was involved in a lot of after school activities. I attended church every Sunday and never did anything too wild that would get me in trouble.

I was very involved in the community around my aunt Maria's Hotel. I was kind and courteous to the customers that came by to visit and I spent time with my god parents, Mr. and Mrs. Wheeler. In short, everybody loved me. Everyone thought I had a perfect life.

But they were wrong.

I may have had everything, clothes, looks, friends, good grades, popularity, but there was one thing I did not have. And it was the one thing I wanted most.

I wanted my family.

You see, when I was a baby, my mother decided that she couldn't afford to feed me. My father had long since disappeared and our family had no money. So she sent me away.

Although I know she had my best interests at heart, I still can't help but feel angry. She wanted me to have beautiful clothes and to have a good life, to be able to eat as much food as I wanted every night. But all I wanted was to be near her. Near my family. To have her comfort me whenever my heart got broken. To have her love and care for me. To be involved in family get togethers.

To be included.

But all I got were stories and photos and letters. Theresa's engagement to Ethan Crane. Luis falling in love with Sheridan. Miguel's baby daughter being born. Antonio's homecoming. Birthday parties, graduations, Christmas parties, festivals, all these things I wasn't apart of.

I wish I wasn't the one that had been chosen to leave.

Luis said it was because mama didn't want to separate me from my friends. Theresa says I was lucky because I never had to go through periods of hunger.

But I say they were the lucky ones. I am an outsider to the Lopez-Fitzgerald family. Anyone can see the closeness Theresa and Luis share. I look through old photos and I see Miguel and Theresa smiling, their arms around each other. Luis throwing a snowball at Miguel. Theresa laughing at Luis because he had food thrown on him. The three of them building a snowman in winter. Mama hugging them in a group photo. I am not in any of these pictures. Antonio isn't either. Sometimes I wonder if he had ever felt the way I did. He was as much of an outsider as I was. But the difference between us was that he chose to leave. I was sent away.

They envy me, I envy them.

I stand here in Theresa's room at the Crane mansion, watching mama hold Theresa as she cried out in pain. And I wonder if she would ever hold me like that. I would never admit this out loud, but I'm jealous. Theresa is very lucky.

I would trade up all my pretty clothes, my jewelry, everything, just to have that bond with my family.

I'm sitting in the hospital waiting room with mama waiting to hear Theresa's reports. Despite my anger, I hope nothing is wrong with my sister. I do love her.

Arms were then wrapped around me and I turned to see mama smiling at me. Suddenly my heart seemed to sing and I leaned in for a hug. I love you mama. Someday, when I no longer feel this anger I will be able to tell you. But for now, this will do.

Thank you Luis for making me come home.

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_I think you all know what to do! (Winks)_


End file.
